Holes, feet, and pimples

Have you ever had one of those conversations where it starts out just great, and then when you weren't thinking you say something - something little, just a little thought, phrase, etc. - it slips out - you didn't even consciously think to say it. Next thing you know you're 10 feet under trying to dig yourself out of a mine shaft that's caving in with amazing speed.

Yea, I had one of those the other day - I said something that I probably shouldn't have. It wasn't anything bad or anything - just something that I had thought, but didn't necessarily need to say. I won't go into too much detail as the person I was talking to will probably read this. I look back now and it's almost comical to me. I mean what do you do? You weren't watching your mouth closely enough, and then woop, it slipped out. Now you gotta backtrack, run circles, douse fires, dislodge your foot from your mouth, and all those good things. All the while you're sitting there beating yourself upside the head thinking: "Gee flippin' whiz, why did I say that?"

For me it was sad because no matter how I tried to remedy the situation I could tell the damage was irreversible. It was like trying to glue back a shattered mirror - never can make it exactly how it was before. Even though the person I was talking to said they understood what I meant - I could tell that my simple slip-up was a mountain they were having a hard time scaling.
This post goes out to all who've ever had the uncomfortable situation of digging you foot of your mouth, grasping for air in a quickly filling hole, or any such situation. While I really like the metaphors we already have for such situations I propose a new one.
It's like when you have a pimple on your face. You know you shouldn't pop it, but you do anyway. But, it's not ready. So what happens? Well first of all it hurts like the dickens, and then every morning when you wake up and walk into the bathroom you're greeted by your own stupidity as it stares at you from the mirror.
Good morning sunshine, it's me. I'm that pimple you shouldn't have popped - now I'm huge, and ugly, and I'm going to stick around for awhile just to make sure you remember how stupid you were to pop me. (I think this is the point where it seems to laugh at your from the mirror)
So next time you see a hole, look at your feet, or resist the temptation to pop that pimple - remember: some things just don't need to be said.
Watch yourself, or you might be struggling in that proverbial hole, foot in mouth, staring straight at the swollen reminder of your folly.

Man's Search for Meaning

I just finished reading "Man's search for meaning," by Viktor Frankl. It's one of those books that changes your life, causes a paradigm shift, makes you re-evaluate what you're doing, etc. It was awesome. Included are some of my favorite quotes from the book.

• "It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life—daily and hourly. Our answer must consist, not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual."

• "Man is capable of changing the world for the better if possible, and of changing himself for the better if necessary.

• We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way."

• "Nietzsche's words, 'He who has a why to live for can bear with almost any how.'"

I just remember on the mission people would always ask: "Why do you walk around everyday? People turn you down all the time, it's hot, and it's got to be tiring... Why?" I never really knew how to put into words the answer - but I think Viktor Frankl taught the principle fairly clearly. If our "why" for living is strong enough, we can and will go through any "what" and "how" that it takes to get there. Passion, vision, discipline, and conscience are the keys to success.
Passion - drives you
Discipline - controls your passion and focuses it
Vision - inspires you
Conscience - Keeps it all in check

Spring

Well it's that time of year again. The time when stress abounds, finals get taken out one by one, tears flow, and good-bye's are said. It's also the time when flip flops start appearing, the lock on the pool disappears, and me and my roommates start singing Grease songs. What a great time of year it is. I'm sad at this season as once again I need to say goodbye to so many people who I have grown to love. I'll miss things like Garrett's laugh (which is raucous, violent, and quite entertaining if you've never heard it), Chase's voice (which I heard many a morning coming through the vent from downstairs), Bob's puns, Bouch's ability to connect me with the real world, Brusky's laugh and random noises whenever I would massage his shoulders. Good times, good memories.
But, once again - it's time to move on. On to bigger and better - new people, new roommates, new experiences. Isn't it weird how that happens? We meet people who we swear we'll never forget, who we consider some of our closest friends, and inevitably the time comes when we all have to move on. People graduate, go home, get jobs, or just move to another ward. We go our separate ways, and try as you might - you can't ever really go back to how it was. You can't ever re-live all those old memories. But, you know what? I think maybe it's supposed to be that way. We couldn't possible function if we always had all the people we have ever known or loved around us at all times. It would be chaos - way too many people to talk to, things to do, etc. I guess the only thing we can take with us is the memories and the lessons learned. But how cool is that? We get to start over again, meet a whole bunch of new people, and make a whole bunch of new memories. Only this time - you've got the added experience from the things learned previously.
So, while I am sad at this time to say goodbye to so many friends, I'm also pretty darn happy. Bring on the warm weather, the long warm nights, the stars, the new friends, and the new experiences. I'm sure that I'll get to see a lot of them again - that's the way life works - real friends always seem to show up again at random moments. Usually right when you need 'em.