Have you ever had someone say something to you that really hurt? They were joking, and you knew they were joking, but it still really hurt? I consider myself and pretty easy-going guy, with pretty thick skin (judge for yourselves, I could be wrong on that one) but, I had something said to me that really stung.
We all have things we believe in - things we try and do. Things we stick up for, invest ourselves, in, commit ourselves to, etc. I have some things like that (I think everyone does) and it was when someone began to poke fun - to call me out in a way - on one of those things that I really do believe in, something I am trying really hard to do because I really think that it's important - it was when they began to make fun of that, that I was really hurt.
This caused me to think. We really do need to be careful about what we say. This person and I have a great relationship - we tease each other all the time. I expect that we will continue to be good friends and tease each other. But, this experience made me think about how careful I need to be. A little slip of the tongue and I may hurt someone else.
Sarcasm. It's one of my favorite things in the world. I love it - use it, laugh at it - all the time. I also think though that it gets me into more trouble than anything else. It's hard to know when you've crossed the line. When your remarks may stray into an area that someone else feels really strongly about, somewhere that they really believe in, and have committed themselves to do. Even though it's simply sarcastic it still hurts. And as has been said many times: "There's a little truth under every sarcastic remark."
Don't worry - I'm fine. I have moved on, and everything is okay. But, I still think the point stands. We need to be more careful about what we say - especially when it is sarcastic. You never know when you may say something that really hurts someone.
5 comments:
Hey, come of my Youth from our ward went to EFY in Washington!
Also, I believe that being genuine wtih everyone is the best way to go.
I like all your posts. Very insightful. We miss you here at the MTC.
I like all your posts. Very insightful. We miss you here at the MTC.
Words are very powerful. The can be very constructive (see John 1: 1-3), as well as destructive (see James 3).
Remember Elder Holland's talk a few conferences ago? http://lds.org/conference/talk/display/0,5232,23-1-690-7,00.html
I especially liked this quote:
"Be constructive in your comments to a child—always. Never tell them, even in whimsy, that they are fat or dumb or lazy or homely. You would never do that maliciously, but they remember and may struggle for years trying to forget—and to forgive. And try not to compare your children, even if you think you are skillful at it. You may say most positively that "Susan is pretty and Sandra is bright," but all Susan will remember is that she isn't bright and Sandra that she isn't pretty."
Much of that could go for our interactions with anyone, not just children.
Neal
Sorry Scotty. I'm sure it was something that Fish said. I'll get him with a shovel or something for you.
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